Broken
by LiliersChan
Summary: Usagi becomes depressed after the starlights leave, things between her and Mamoru are changing. will someone be able to rescue her from herself before it's too late?
1. Chapter 1

Broken

Hey guys. So this is my first fanfic hope you like it. Sorry for any mistakes please review

Also I do not own Sailor moon

Enjoy :3

She stared at the reflection staring back at her. Placing a hand delicately to her cheek, the shadows darkened under puffy red eyes. The young girl ran her bony pale fingers over her features.

_Why?_

That question always pondered her mind, that and what if. She turned her head to stare at the alarm clock, realizing she had to get ready for school. Slowly standing from her stool in front of her vanity the girl headed for the bathroom to shower. Closing her eyes, she let the hot water beat against her skin; it felt soothing and relaxing against her tense muscles. Opening her cerulean eyes, she glanced to the side, one object in particular gaining her attention. At first she hesitated, before finally allowing herself to reach for the object. Letting out a sigh she pressed it against the tender skin of her thigh, in one swift movement she slid the blade across her skin, wincing for only a second at the pain. A small wicked smile tugged at her lips as she let the water rinse away the evidence of what she had just done. The young blonde finished washing up; she turned the water off and replaced the small razorblade in its hiding spot. Standing in front of the mirror, and dabbing some cream to cover the shadows under her eyes, she applied some eyeliner and mascara trying to liven up her eyes a bit. She smiled at herself in the mirror ignoring the throbbing pain omitting from her thigh. Heading to her room the blonde put her hair up in her traditional style, got dressed and retreated down the stairs. The girl placed her usual bright smile on her face as she headed to the kitchen

"Good morning everyone!" She walked up to her mom and placed a gentle kiss to her cheek as she grabbed her breakfast, preparing to take it on the go.

"Good morning sweetheart. Have a good day at school!" her mother smiled before turning to continue with the housework. The blonde patted her annoying little brothers head on her way towards the door nibbling a bit at the breakfast her mother made and heading out the door. A few blocks down she spotted a big red bow atop another blondes head, immediately she recognized who the bow belonged to. She took in a deep breath before forcing yet another smile on her face; she sped up her pace, waving an arm in the ar.

"Hey Mina!"

"Oh hey girlfriend! You're actually a bit early. I'm sooo excited for school." The bubbly blonde continued on with her chattering as Usagi continued with her charade. The two blondes came upon the school, watching as other students in the same uniforms gathered in the front and also headed inside the building. Usagi stepped into her first classroom; she took a sharp intake of breath and held it as she stared at the empty desk behind hers. She forced herself to hold back the tears as the memories returned to her.

_The sun was setting. The hues of orange reds and pinks emerged from the horizon, it was indeed a beautiful sight, but the scene occurring was not as beautiful. It was in fact a sad day, the day her best friend was leaving her. _

_"Do you guys really have to go?" a raven haired beauty asked. That was rei. _

_"Yes, everyone is waiting for us". Usagi watched as they gathered, her mind screamed for them to stay but she knew they couldn't. They had a planet full of people waiting for them, and she had her destiny... with Mamoru. _

_"Odango!" her eyes widened as she realized she was being spoken to. "I'm glad you got your boyfriend back."_

_She once again forced that smile on her face. "It was because of you Seiya." _

_"Oi. Odango. I'll never forget you"._

_Her eyes widened once more as she forced herself to hold back the tears that were pressing to fall. She hesitated for a moment as she thought about her words carefully, "Yes, we'll be friends forever!" _

_"Oh, Man!"_

_She heard everyone around her burst out into laughter and took a deep breath ready to continue with the charade. "What? I don't get it!"_

_"Well. Ja ne everyone!" _

_Her mind screamed for him to stop, but it seemed as if her mouth wouldn't cooperate. She was about to raise her hand out for them but she felt someone grab her shoulder, she turned her head to realize it was Mamoru. He looked down at her with a questioning stare. She watched in silence as they turned and sped for the sky. The tears finally releasing from her eyes as she watched them go leaving nothing but a trail of red dust._

"Usagi! My God girl, wake up from la la land!" she could feel Mina pushing her towards her chair. How long she was standing there in a daze she didn't know, but she already couldn't wait to get out of here. The room seemed suffocating. She needed something, and she needed it bad. Sitting at her desk Usagi tried to focus her attention on the teachers lecture.

The girls all made their way to their favorite spot to eat for lunch. Conveniently it was the only spot with shade. The girls all sat with their bento boxes, all except Usagi.

"Forgot your lunch again girlfriend?" Mina piped up.

Usagi blinked at her a few times, "Oh... yeah. You know me! Heh."

"Here Usagi-Chan you can share with me. I know how much you love my cooking" Makoto smiled at her.

Usually Usagi would have jumped on that in a second instead she nonchalantly reached over and grabbed a few bites. The girls were all too distracted in their chattering to even notice how little the young blonde had actually eaten. All of the girls sighed and slowly got up from the ground as they heard the bell for class to start. The rest of the day dragged on. Usagi gripped at her thigh, the distinct pain was still there, but the itching was the worst. She looked up.

_Five more minutes_!

As if on cue her leg started shaking as if noticing what time it was. She just couldn't wait to get out and go home. The teacher averted her eyes in the blondes' direction with a _stop that look_. Immediately the blonde stopped her movement, preventing the tapping of her shoes against the floor.

_Ring!_

_Finally!_ Immediately her and the other students around her got up from their chairs and headed straight for the door.

"Usagi-Chan! You want to go to crowns with us?" Mina and the others came up behind her as she was heading out the front door.

"Uh... Not today girls! I have a lot of homework to do, and I want to start the year off good." they all nodded in understanding as they watched the blonde turn her back and head for her home.


	2. Chapter 2

Here's chapter 2 sorry for any mistakes Hope you Enjoy and please review :3

Also I do not own sailor moon Lol

"Have you guys noticed... Usagi acting very different lately?" all the girls nodded at Mina's remark.

"Yeah i guess i actually miss that meatball head..." Rei murmured as she took a sip of her soda.

"You know...Now that i think about it i haven't even seen Mamoru-Chan and Usagi-Chan together anymore. Do you think they're fighting again or something?" Makoto mentioned.

"Maybe it's more than that you guys..." Ami murmured. They all looked at her confusion written all over their faces.

"What do you mean Ami?" Rei finally asked.

"Well..." She glanced to the side. "I could be wrong, but it seems something... has changed about our princess ever since the starlight's left. And maybe it's affected her and Mamoru-Chan's relationship..." All of their eyes seemed to widen as the idea never donned on them.

"But it's been months! Six to be exact!" Mina piped up. She knew that Usagis feelings ran a little deeper than friendship, but she also knew how dedicated Usagi was to her destiny, to Mamoru-chan... And to Chibi-Usa.

"It's just a theory you guys!" Ami replied.

"Well then let's just get to the bottom of this!" Makoto punched her fist into the table getting a little too excited about the situation. She just laughed it off while the other girls watched her and giggled.

Usagi began on her walk home alone. She felt bad for bailing on the girls but the memories were getting to her and she had to relieve some of the pain in her heart. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and looked at the ten missed calls and four text messages, all from the same person of course. She deleted them without even looking. She didn't want to deal with this person right now. Her eyes seemed to brighten a bit as she saw the view of her house. _Almost there...!_ The girl hurried to her house, screaming that she was home and immediately running up to her room to repeat the act from this morning. Good thing her cat Luna was out with Artemis.

After she cleaned up the blonde grabbed her IPod, put in the headphones and began jamming out. She grabbed some pills from her drawer downing two of them, before falling back onto her bed. She felt the vibration of the phone next to her; she pushed it off the bed and turned the music up, tuning everything out.

Three heads peered over the balcony, taking in the view in front of them. It sure was beautiful. A hand ran through raven hair, sighing at how the scene reminded them so much of the blue planet that held their heart. Immediately as if sensing her presence the three turned and knelt on one knee, bowing their heads in respect.

"Princess" They said in unison.

"Rise my starlight's." The fireball princess smiled down at them. "We have all worked hard for this accomplishment, once again our planet is whole." she watched as the three turned once again looking out from the balcony. She noticed the sadness in their eyes. If only they would talk to her like they used to.

Suddenly the blondes' door swung open and she could hear a distinct scream. "Usagi! Get up! I've been calling you for five minutes now, dinner is done!" the blonde shot up from the bed.

"Sorry momma i had my headphones on." she quickly averted her eyes down at her legs, making sure the markings weren't visible, as she took the ear buds out of her ear. Her mother only smiled at her before turning on her heel and heading down the stairs. A minute later the blonde was following, heading down to eat.

Once again she found herself flopping back on her bed, she let out a long restless sigh before taking two more pills and downing them with some water. She stared blankly at the ceiling as her mind once again began to wander. She really hated when it did that, and it did it more than she would like it to. Suddenly all of the flashbacks started again. It was always of him, the times they had, how he had been there for her and only her. He protected her. He loved her, and deep down she knew she always loved him too. She felt a twinge of pain in her heart. She quickly got up heading for the drawer, she knew she shouldn't but she needed at least one night of sleep. She downed one more pill with her water and headed for the bed, turning out the lamp and closing her eyes, hoping that sleep would take over very soon


	3. Chapter 3

Well here's Chapter 3. Again sorry for any mistakes. I hope you like it! :3

Unfortunately I do not own sailor moon.

Usagi awoke with a start.

_7:20_

She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and looked around her room in a daze before reaching over and turning the alarm clock off. She slowly got out of bed, looking down at the markings on her legs. Some old some new, she opened the drawer to the nightstand she pulled out a tube of cream and began rubbing it on her skin to prevent from scarring. They didn't completely disappear, but they definitely weren't as noticeable. _Why do I even bother? _Her eyelids seemed heavier this morning, although she didn't have to go through the night with the nightmares that haunted her, maybe she had taken too many sleeping pills this time. _I'm surprised I even heard the alarm clock_! She rose from the bed and headed into the bathroom to get ready. Applying more cream to the bags under her eyes and then adding the eyeliner and mascara. Now that school had started everything seemed to be a routine for her. Again she headed down the stairs to greet the family with her fake smile. This time she sat at the table and ate a little breakfast with them before heading for the door. She said her good byes to the family before walking away from the house and down the street, knowing she'd see her bubbly blonde friend just another block away.

The three headed to the throne room, there awaited their fireball princess; she sat comfortably before them, her face completely serene. She watched as the nervousness and confusion shown through their eyes.

"My starlights. Our planet is once again whole, you have worked the hardest. And for that i thank you." The three's lips tugged up into a smile as they listened to Princess Kakyuu of Kinmoku. Once again she spoke up, "to show you my gratitude, I am releasing you for the time being, to take upon a... vacation." Their eyes widened as they noticed a glint of amusement in the fireball princess' eyes.

"What are you talking about princess?" The short silver haired one spoke up. _Had she gone mad? She needed us here, to protect her from any harm!_

"There is still a lot that needs to be done!" the tallest also spoke up. As a habit he pushed the glasses up his nose, blinking a few times as he battled with the thoughts in his head. _We have a duty!_ The one in the middle was utterly speechless. _Was he dreaming again? No… This can't be a dream_. His emotions were all over the place, happiness, sadness, excitement. He just couldn't believe it. Then the questions came. They all looked up at her with questioning glares.

"Silence my starlights." At this they all kept their mouths shut. "The people will finish what needs to be done, and i must admit that I have noticed this sadness in all of your eyes. You miss them." Her statement was indeed blunt. They all looked at each other, not denying that they did miss the blue planet they had stayed on for some time. Not only did they miss the planet but a certain group of girls that lived there. It shocked them all that their sadness was actually that noticeable.

"You will leave tomorrow my starlights. Enjoy yourselves and have a safe trip." She made sure to emphasize on the last part. She knew it would be a long journey to get to that very far planet. The princess was beaming as she witnessed the life brought back into her starlights eyes. Although it pained at her heart knowing the only person she would love was also in love with someone else, their happiness was much more important than her own.

"Now leave, rest up my starlights." She waved them away as she said so. As soon as they turned their backs to retreat she let the tears slide down. Knowing this would be the last time she saw them.

Usagi sat at her desk her mind wandering once again as she ignored the teachers lecture. She needed to brush up on her acting, at least for the girls' sake. She saw the looks they gave her, and she did seem pretty distant from them lately. The young blonde let out a sigh as more memories flooded her head. She hated thinking about him all of the time. She hated thinking about both of them really. It only pained at her heart, tempting her with what awaited her at home. It was like a drug. She needed this to survive, even though in the end it was slowly killing her. The more she thought about it the more her thoughts darkened. _Maybe she should just end it all_. She wanted to fly, to be free from the pain of this world. In the end her body only felt like a shell, as if she really weren't there. She felt like spreading her arms and just... _fall._ She wanted to be numb, to not have to feel at all. _Oh why was the world so cruel?_ The sound of the bell brought her back to reality, once again the girls met her at the door, and this time she waited for them. They all came up smiling.

They traveled together in a group, each keeping an eye out for their best friend. Suddenly the blonde pointed out her finger, "there she is you guys! Let's catch up before she leaves." _Although, it seems this time she is actually waiting for us_, _just like the old Usagi-Chan_, Minako beamed as they all headed towards her.

"Hey girlfriend!" Mina spoke up.

"We're heading over to Reis temple; you want to come with us?" Makoto asked coming up behind Mina, and then behind her was Ami.

"Sure guys! I know we haven't hung out in a while. I miss you guys." she forced a smile on her face, as she followed next to them on their way to Reis. _Play it cool Usagi, don't make it seem too forced_.

They all sat around the table; there were piles of manga lying around, a few snacks laid upon the table as the girls all chatted.

Finally the raven haired girl spoke up, "So how have you and Mamoru-Chan been Usagi?" the girl couldn't help but notice the wince on Usagis face. _What is that girl hiding from us now?_ Usagi forced her lips to tug into a smile.

"Oh we've been great. He's just been busy with school you know, so we don't have as much time to spend together. We're going out tomorrow though, I'm so excited!" She squealed a little to make the lie more believable. All the girls except Rei smiled as they believed to have noticed a part of their old friend returning. The girls continued with their gossip, not even noticing how quiet Usagi actually was. When spoken to she would answer, but other than that she actually wasn't completely there_. I thought spending time with the girls would keep the memories away. Ha! Boy was I wrong. It's been so long since they had left, but he's all I can think of. Why? And then there's stupid Mamoru-Chan. That stupid fool. _

Usagi was the first to leave the group. The girls said their good byes before she headed down the stairs away from the temple and began on her journey home. It was a bit chilly but she didn't mind. She turned her head towards the sky just in time to notice three shooting stars glide through the starry sky. "Quit kidding yourself, Usagi…it's been months they're never coming back…. You lost your chance. And now you're losing it talking to yourself…" she laughed out loud glad that no one else was around this late. She stared at her feet it seemed as if they were just dragging along the walk home. She heard a car coming up behind her not paying much attention to it.

"Koneko!"

Were they talking to her?

"Hey Koneko! You need a ride home?"

She gasped as she turned towards the car. A smile spread across her face. "Oh Haruka! Michiru! I haven't seen you guys in so long!" she ran to the car and got in. "So how have you guys been?"

The aqua-haired beauty turned in her seat, her face serene as always. "We've been great. It's been nice being able to relax and actually spend time together." Her angelic voice answered the young blonde as she reached over to her partner resting her hand on her shoulder, her lips tugged into the smile of an angel. Usagi envied them a little. Their relationship was perfect, they truly loved each other. The car slowed in front of a familiar house.

"Well here we are Koneko."

"Thank you for the ride you guys. It really was great seeing you. Now don't be strangers, okay?" She smiled as she lectured them.

"We're always here for you princess" Haruka answered_. Why are you so different Princess? What happened to make your shine dim so much…? _Usagi got out of the car, turning once more and waving as the car sped off before turning and heading for the front door to her house.


	4. Chapter 4

Well here's chapter 4 thank you for reading so far and please review.

I want to thank StrataLight for the reviews and great ideas.

Also I do not own sailor moon or the song mentioned in the chapter. The song is First Love by Utada Hikaru

Well Enjoy! :3

She fell to her knees gasping for air, slowly her body began to glow and she de-transformed, two others did the same, their hands on their knees, also out of breath.

"That took a lot more than I thought." A man with jet black hair and cerulean eyes finally stood before the other two as they nodded in agreement. He slowly turned; looking over the balcony of what seemed the school. Memories of their departure from here returned to him, he fought back the tears that were trying to force themselves to the surface. He turned his head as he felt the hands of both his brothers on each shoulder.

"We made it though." The tallest, Taiki spoke up.

"Yeah, we're finally home…" the short one with cat-like eyes known as Yaten smiled.

"Right…home." Seiya finally spoke up as he looked out ahead of him. Oh, how he had missed this place. He slowly raised his head towards the stars, a true smile forming at his mouth as he silently thanked his Princess.

She gasped for air, tossing and turning in her sleep, the sweat beading off her forehead. She screamed out in agony her arm stretching out to reach for something that was never there.

_What is going on?_ A black feline with a crescent moon on her forehead awoke with a start, she saw her princess tossing in her sleep. _Another nightmare?_ She quickly walked up to the girls head. "Usagi-Chan! Usagi! Wake up Usagi! It's just a nightmare!" The blond shot up into a sitting position, her eyes widened with fear and sadness. She wiped the sweat from her forehead and the unshed tears from her eyes. Usagi ran her shaking hands through her hair, taking in deep breaths and releasing them_. Calm down Usagi! _

"What was that about Usagi-Chan?" the feline known as Luna came up to her, nuzzling into her hand.

"It was just a nightmare Luna…" she tried to smile.

"What was it about?"

"I…don't really remember.." She tried to make it sound believable.

Luna looked up at her_. Does she really think I'm that stupid?_ _Maybe I should talk to the girls. See what they think…_

"Oh okay, Usagi-Chan just try and get some sleep then." The blonde laid back down as the black feline curled up next to her.

_saigo no kisu wa  
>tabako no flavor ga shita<br>nigakute setsunai kaori_

_ashita no imagoro ni wa  
>anata wa doko ni iru n' darou<br>dare wo omotte 'ru n' darou…  
><em>

Usagi groaned in her sleep her hand reaching for the alarm clock and slamming down on the snooze button. She sat up on her bed and rubbed the sleep from her eyes, how she hated those lovey songs. She definitely did not need to wake up to that. She pushed back the tears from her eyes as she recalled the night before. _How many times was she going to dream that…_

_She was on her first date with him; it felt like the happiest day in her life. They talked and joked around, she felt so relaxed and comfortable with him, and she knew she could be herself around him. He didn't judge her. Usagi enjoyed the games and rides, especially the roller-coaster! but by the end of the night everything fell apart. They were on the rooftop once again and he was leaving. He was leaving her! She knew she didn't want him to leave but she also understood he had people waiting for him. He already had a home. How could she be so selfish and ask him to stay? She cried out as she watched him turn and leave, her arm reaching for him. She was about to run after him but something grabbed her shoulder. It hurt. She turned to see Mamoru pulling her back. She tried screaming at him to let her go but the words wouldn't come out, her hand shot at her mouth, eyes wide. Why couldn't she speak? What was wrong? Her mind continued to scream, and then everything disappeared. There was nothing but darkness. She looked around for her friends, where were they? Suddenly Usagi heard a scream and she ran towards it. The scenery changed and she was on a cliff, and there hanging on the edge was Chibi-usa! Usagi quickly ran trying to grab ahold of Chibi-usa, but by the time she got there…._

It was the same thing almost every night. Her eyes darted around the room. _No sign of Luna_. Usagi pulled the blanket off of her and raced to the bathroom. She pulled the blade from its hiding spot and watched as it slid across her skin. Every time felt easier to her. Her tears quickly dried up and she just sat there, a wicked smile tugging at her lips as she watched the blood seep from her cut.

"Usagi-Chan! Breakfast is ready!"

She gasped at the sound of her mom's voice. She quickly cleaned up the mess, bandaged her cut and ran into her room to change clothes. Putting her hair up in her traditional style Usagi ran down the stairs and into the kitchen. "Good morning mom!" She quickly grabbed a bite to eat and started for the door. "I'm going to the park" She yelled before her mom could even ask. She turned smiling and waving before heading out and closing the door behind her.

Usagi clutched the bag in her hand close to her as she started walking towards the park. She looked around making sure she wouldn't run into one of the other girls. She headed down a familiar path, pushing aside the branches as she walked. Her eyes brightened as she came upon her secret spot. A small pond surrounded by weeping willows. The place was so serene, she liked coming here when she didn't want to be bothered, she still didn't regret not telling any of the other girls about this place. She sat under one of the trees and pulled out a sketchbook from the bag she had. She opened it up, skimming through the pages before stopping on a blank sheet. She pulled out her pencil and began sketching, it helped her get away and get her mind off things she didn't want to worry about at the time. Although it pained her a little because it was something that he had gotten her into, it made her feel somewhat closer to him. It was nice actually having something peaceful in her life for a change.

"Is everyone here?"

A group gathered towards the back corner of Crowns arcade, in the center sat two felines, one black, and the other white.

"Good. I called you guys because I was wondering if Usagi-Chan has talked to any of you about anything lately…" Luna trailed off.

"Like what Luna?" Makoto asked.

"Well for months it seems she hasn't been herself, she hasn't slept really well and keeps having these nightmares. Every time I ask her about them she tells me the same thing, that she can't remember the dream. She…" Luna was quickly cut off by the sound of Rei gasping. Reis eyes widened as she pointed towards the sound of the door opening.

"Hey you guys isn't that Mamoru-Chan?" They all turned their heads towards the direction of where Rei was pointing.

"I though Usagi-Chan and Mamoru-Chan had a date today!" The raven haired girl quickly looked at Luna.

"Usagi-Chan didn't tell me about any date." The cat blinked at her a few times.

"Let's go ask him and get to the bottom of this then" Makoto quickly got up from her seat and headed towards the front, Rei tagging along behind her.

"Mamoru-Chan! Hey Mamoru-Chan!" Rei quickly pushed past Makoto, more and more questions forming in her head the closer she got to him.

Mamoru slowly turned away from Motoki at the sound of his name being called. "Oh! Hey you guys haven't seen you…"

"Where's Usagi-Chan?" Rei quickly cut him off before he could even finish his sentence.

"What? She's not with you guys?" He just stared at her dumbfounded.

"I thought she was supposed to be on a date with you!" Rei pointed her finger at him, annoyance written all over her face_. This didn't make any sense at all. Did Usagi-Chan cancel? Did something happen to her? If so why is Mamoru-Chan here? What's going on?_

"_Is it true?"_

"_I don't believe it!"_

The three at the front all turned towards the whispers behind them, they blinked a few times as they saw a heard of people gathering outside. They saw cameras flashing, girls screaming, and… _No way!_

_The Three Lights are bac_k?


	5. Chapter 5

**Hiya everyone. Sorry for the long absence. For a long time I found myself with absolutely no motivation to continue this story. I had all sorts of ideas on how I wanted it to go but found it very hard to actually put it down on paper. But im giving it another try, thanks to the wonderful encouragement and ideas from StrataLight, and those that have either reviewed or added my story on their alerts. I can never thank you guys enough. 3 **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor moon.**

**Enjoy :3**

Mamoru stood there dumbfounded, blinking a few times he finally came back to reality, he looked at the two girls in front of him still gaping out the window. His eyes darted around him before he took the chance to sneak out.

Not believing the site in front of them, the two girls looked at each other, then back out the window, only to turn back around and find out that Mamoru was no where to be found. They both glared at Motoki who just shrugged and turned away from them. Rei let out a loud huff, before turning back around and storming out the door, Makoto following close behind. They both pushed their way through the screaming fan girls that had surrounded themselves around the Three Lights. The three boys watched shocked as the two girls began screaming like mad women for everyone to back off, causing the group of girls to run off in fear. Once the area was cleared, Rei grabbed onto Seiya and Yaten, Makoto grabbed ahold of Taiki, and they dragged the stunned boys back inside and to the table of their other shocked friends. Ami was on the end gripping and playing with the end of her skirt as she stole a glance at the tallest Taiki. Minako had a slight blush gracing her cheeks as she looked up at Yaten, but of course was the first to recover. A big Smile covered her face as she quickly jumped up and latched herself onto Yatens arm, "Oooh My God! I can't believe you guys are back! When did you return? How is your planet doing? Oh! How is..."

"Where is Odango..?" Seiya glanced around the table, intterupting the bubbly blondes rambling. Before anyone could answer Rei bursted out, "She's on a date with Mamoru!" Earning herself a glare from the other girls around the table. _Oooh why did i say that! Well... too late now.._

Seiya winced slightly, "Oh" was all he could manage to get out. He had almost completely forgotten about her 'wonderful' boyfriend. The whole time they were away from earth, all he did was fantasize about what it would be like to be with his Odango. The girls dragged the three boys down around the table. Minako smiled as she snuggled up against Yaten, finally changing the subject, "So tell us everything you guys have been up to!" Yaten looked down at the blonde attached onto him, and rolled his eyes,_ I'm.. actually glad some things are still the same... _He smiled softly to himself. Seiya leaned back in his chair and folded his arms over his chest, looking towards Taiki to answer the question. Taiki let out a breath, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose with his index finger, "Well as soon as we made it back to our planet, we realized the planet was already trying to reconstruct itself. Immediately we began building, and the days to follow the people that had made it out were slowly returning after hearing the news of Galaxias defeat." Everyone nodded, their expressions turning serious as they all thought back on the events that played through only mere months ago. Mina's arm subconsciously tightened around Yatens, whom didn't mind at all.

"So how long are you guys staying for?" The question finally forced itself out of Amis mouth, unaware that the question was haunting everyones mind since they spotted the Three Lights. Finally Seiya spoke, "Um, we're not sure yet, the princess believed we earned ourselves a vacation, so here we are!" He laughed softly, the atmosphere starting to lighten some. Mina finally perked up, "Well we're definitely glad to see you guys again!" They all nodded in agreement, real smiles placed upon all of their faces as they continued to chat about what has been going in their lives.

Usagi looked down at the finished picture, her eyes widening as she realized what...no who she had just drawn. She let out a deep sigh as the brim of her eyes started watering at the sight in front of her. She chewed at her bottom lip and quickly stole a few glances around her, making sure no one was around. She grabbed a hold of the bag beside her, digging around for her hidden object. Upon finding it, she glanced around once more and gripped the end of her skirt, hiking it up her legs, she bit down on her bottom lip once more as she pressed the item against her skin, sliding it over old scars. The tears building up finally fell down her pale cheeks, a small smile tugged at her lips as she watched the first signs of blood surface through the wound. She wiped the small razorblade in the grass, putting it back in its hiding place inside her bag, she reached for some tissue and pressed it against her now throbbing thigh. Usagi slowly let out her breath, trying to calm herself and leaning back against the tree. She gently blew her bangs out of her eyes and stared up at the passing clouds. Once again she found herself wandering to past events. _Am I not good enough?_ blinking back the tears that were once again trying to force themselves out, Usagi quickly recovered and pulled the skirt back down over her legs, she grabbed the sketchbook that had fallen on the grass beside her, back in the bag. She slowly came to a stand and turned around, glancing around once more for anything she had forgotten, she discarded the bloody tissue in the trash can and slowly made her way back home.

Mamoru made his way down the familiar pathway, there were kids playing, people walking their dogs, and couples relaxing on the park benches. _Why did I even bother coming here anyways?_ He sighed and continued walking, looking down at his feet as he did so, suddenly he felt a body run into him, instinctively he reached out and grabbed a hold of the petite forms shoulder. Finally after what seemed an eternity he gazed down, an apology on the tip of his tongue before his eyes widened at the familiarity of the hair style and blonde hair.

"Usako..!" He gasped out. The blondes head snapped up, eyes widening as she clutched the bag to her chest. Mamoru clutched onto her shoulders, giving her a slight shake.

"Usako what is going on? I've..."

She shook her head tearing herself out of his grasp, "I'm sorry I have to go..." She quickly stepped away from him, and sprinted past him, _Please don't follow me!_ Daring not to steal a glance behind her and running until her house was in sight. She opened the front door, "I'm home!" she screamed to no one in general as she ran up the stairs to her room. She quickly closed the door behind her, glancing around the room and noticing her feline friend was no where to be found. She panted heavily as she leaned back against the door sliding down it into a sitting position. Upon finally catching her breath, Usagi brought her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs and burrying her face into the top of her knees. She squeezed her eyes shut tight, the guilt once again creeping into her heart._ Im so sorry...Mamoru, I guess its not completely your fault... _

**It's sooo shoort i knooow im sorry. I'm trying to grasp exactly where im going to go with this story And now that im getting into working on it again, it shouldn't take me months and months to update! Pleas read and review, and i apologize for any mistakes. **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hiya! I've been trying really hard to work on this as much as I can. I'm still having trouble trying to put all of the ideas for this story into sentences so it's getting a bit harder to update. Also I aplogize that the chapters aren't really that long. I type them out and they seem long but once I update them on here I realize.. they really aren't! haha. Well anyways, I aplogize for any mistakes and also:**

**I do not own Sailor Moon! :3**

Usagis head snapped up at the sound of knocking on the door behind her. _I must have fallen asleep..._

"Usagi it's dinner time." She listened to the gentle voice of her mother, and wiped the sleep from her eyes.

"I'll be down in a minute mama." she listened to the retreating footsteps of her mother as she stretched her arms up and above her head, stifling a yawn before coming to a stand. She stood there and ran her fingers through her hair, letting a small sigh escape her lips. She just felt... so exhausted all of the time. She took a few small painful steps towards her closet, opening it and grabbing the closest thing to her. Grabbing the bottom of her shirt, she quickly lifted it over her head throwing it on the floor beside her feet. Usagi unzipped her skirt and let it fall around her feet. Looking down at herself, she smoothed her fingers over the old scars scattered across her thighs. Wincing slightly as she remembered the reasons the scars were there, the pain she felt before she created them with her own hands. Biting down on her bottom lip, Usagi fought back the urge to release some of that pain at that very moment. The sound of buzzing brought her out of her predicament. A small frown graced her features, her eyes laying upon the source that was making that annoying sound. Reaching for her Pajama bottoms, she quickly slid them on, followed by a tank top and completely ignored the buzzing coming from her nightstand. Quickly smoothing out her hair, and letting out a deep breath, she made her way down the hall placing yet another almost too perfect fake smile upon her face. Usagi sat through dinner picking at her food in a daze, her mother continued giving her worried glances, but kept silent.

Running into Mamoru earlier had really messed with her. She couldn't keep the sadness in his eyes out of her mind. _I shouldn't be feeling this... guilt_. _So then why do I? _She shut her eyes and shook her head slightly as she tried to drown the image of him at the park out of her mind. She lifted her fork almost robotically to her mouth and forced herself to swallow the food her mother had made. It wasn't that the food wasn't good, her mothers food was always amazing, even better than her friend Makotos, but the smell made her nauseous, and the sight of food made her want to instinctively turn away from it. She just barely had an appetite for anything these past few weeks. She caught the worried glances her mom gave her every now and then and realized her act was beginning to falter. She needed to focus on the task at hand in fear of raising any questions about her actions. Placing a smile back on her face, she pushed back the thoughts swarming in her head and joined in on the conversation.

Dinner was finally over, it had felt like hours to Usagi, she politely excused herself, mentioning something about doing homework and headed back upstairs. Letting out a sigh, she wiped the smile from her face as she jogged up the stairs and straight into the bathroom. Leaning back against the door, Usagi buried her face into her hands her fingertips dug into her head as she tried to shake the images of her and Mamoru out of her head. Holding back the sob threatening to escape her lips she quickly locked the door behind her and dashed towards her hiding place. Upon finding what she was looking for, she yanked her pajama pants down and dug, said item against a new spot on her thigh. Usagi watched with tear-filled eyes as she slid the blade agonizingly slow across her skin. A small smile found its way on her face as she watched the red liquid spill slowly from the now open wound, her tears slowed and eventually stopped. After finally calming down Usagi cleaned up the mess she had made, placed her blade back in its hiding place and left the bathroom, she ignored her younger brother and the confused expression placed on his face as she headed straight into her room. Closing the door behind her Usagi walked over to her vanity and sat in front of it and began undoing her hair and letting it fall down along her back. Grabbing the brush, she gently hummed to herself and ran the brush through her hair. Once finished, she set the brush back down, reached over for her Ipod and put her head phones on. Usagi slowly stood, closing her eyes and dancing along with the music. She mouthed the words, as she danced her way to her bed before flopping down on it, smiling a true smile, she reached over and grabbed her phone off her nightstand. Flipping the phone open, her smile immediately faded as she looked at the writing on her phone. _Ugh 31 missed phone calls, Seriously? you would think he'd get the hint that I dont want to talk to him! Now I really really wish I hadn't run into him. Damnit! I should have been watching where I was going. Him seeing me has just made his constant calling even worse than it already was! _Her facial expression softened somewhat as she saw the missed phone calls from Minako. _Should I?_ Usagi shook her head at the thought and closed her phone, placing it back on the nightstand. _I'll see her in the morning on the way to school. _She stole a few glances around her room, now noticing the missing presence of her feline friend, Luna. _Must be with Artemis. _Usagi nodded to herself before, rolling onto her side and letting the music playing take her away to a whole other world. She didn't even notice the head poke into her room and turn off the light, or the whispered_ I love you hunny_, from her mother before she exited, and closed the door behind her.

_Golden hair cascaded down her back, her arms reached up and entwined around his neck and the most beautiful smile graced her face. An angelic laugh escaped her lips as she listened to what he was saying. His face was covered in shadow as they danced along the ballroom floor. They seemed to fit perfectly, her feet feeling as if they weren't even touching the ground. Suddenly they stopped. Her fingers caressed at the nape of his neck as she rose on her tippy-toes, her face only centimeters away from his own. Suddenly her eyes widened, as she stared into deep blue eyes filled with.. so much anger. She felt herself being pulled up against his chest, his lips slamming forcefully on her own. No! She struggled against him, eyes welling up with tears. This isn't right! Those eyes...they're not his eyes... _

Usagi tossed on her bed, her eyes quickly opening only to close against the sunlight peering in through her window. Thick strands of hair clung to her face, she opened one eye to steal a glance at the alarm clock next to her. Gasping loudly the blonde jumped out of bed. _I'm going to be late! _Racing around the bedroom, she grabbed the items she needed and raced into the bathroom to quickly shower and apply her make-up.

Finishing her traditional hair-style, Usagi raced out of her room and down the stairs, said her good-byes, and slammed the front door behind her. She briskly walked her way towards the school, slipping her hand into her bag and pulling out her phone, she opened it to find even more missed phone calls from Mamoru, she quickly deleted them before opening her inbox to check her texts.

_Minako: OMG GIRL WHERE ARE YOU!_

_Minako: I've seriously been trying to get a hold of you all night, call me ASAP!_

_Minako: USAGIII!_

_Minako: Okay seriously, just meet at the usual place in the morning. Boy do i have a surprise for you!_

Usagi raised an eyebrow at the last one, she looked up from her phone to realize she was reaching the corner her and Minako always met up at. Immediately she saw the big red bow atop the bubbly blondes head. _But wait... who is with her...?_ Usagi slowed her pace even more, she squinted her eyes trying to see who it was. As if on cue the excited blonde turned and noticed Usagi approaching, she waved her hand in the air, "Usagi! Hurry up will ya!" The three standing with her, slowly turned in her direction. A loud gasp escaped Usagis lips, _No way! It couldn't be, right? _The sound of honking and her name being screamed snapped her out of her daze. _Oh God, I'm in the middle of the road! _She quickly finished running across the road towards her best friend, and the three she never imagined seeing again. Upon stopping in front of them, Usagi, placed her hands on her knees panting heavily, before straightening herself. She continued staring at them wide-eyed, still not believing they were actually right there in front of her.

"Hey...Odango..." Seiya merely whispered. It was enough to bring her out of her daze once again, She seemed to be dazing out a lot lately, fighting the urge to cry Usagi lunged herself against him. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and buried her face into his chest._ Am I dreaming? This must be a dream, it can't be real!_ Seiya gently patted her back, forcing himself to gently push her back so he could get a good look at her face, "I bet you missed seeing my good looking face everyday, huh?" He laughed gently, already missing the feel of her in his arms. Letting out a small laugh, Usagi wiped at the tears forming under her eyes as she looked up at him, she turned her head from side to side, "As if!" Slowly stepping back the blonde went to give both Taiki, and Yaten a quick hug, "I've missed all of you, it's so wonderful to finally see my friends again."

Seiya took a small moment to scan over Usagi completely. He bit down on the inside of his cheek before they all turned and began walking in the direction of the school. As they were walking Seiya and Yatens eyes met. They both nodded to each other as they realized the same thing. Usagi's shine wasn't as bright as it used to be, and it was fading dangerously fast.


End file.
